Rev. 6:12-13 UNTIMELY FIGS (Come into Kitchen post)

 "And I beheld, when he had opened the sixth seal, and lo, there was a great earthquake, and the sun became black as sackcloth of hair, and the moon became like blood;

And the stars of heaven fell unto the earth, even as a fig tree casteth her untimely figs, when she is shaken of a mighty wind." (Rev.6:12-13)

I had to smile. I wonder what that earthquake will be like? Our family's been through a "Shindo 6" quake in 2011. And Sun., at 4:30 AM it was still black-ish out. But I suppose in an eclipse, it's not even dark-ish, but completely black--I wonder what'll happen then? And the blood I saw wasn't the moon, but a physical filter between my nose and the heaven...will man be living under some sort of dome at the time of the prophecy, a dome which will be spattered red with blood? And when I looked up Sunday, altho' the stars looked small, at least they stayed up there, didn't get tripped up by some crevice as they traveled across the heaven to fall to the earth in spectacular collisions. I tried to envision what it would be like that day in the future when those things happened.

They're not supposed to--are untimely--like figs being shaken from trees. Is that the way I looked when I turned from the vending machine to walk home and flew splat onto the sidewalk? But it was shi-kua-sa, not figs. God can use anything. And even a slight breath from His nostrils can be a mighty wind shaking man senseless. Lord, help us fear You as we ought.

I think what happened Sunday was a Heavenly Daddy's loving spanking. The past few weeks, I was overworking, sometimes pulling all-nighters. I had the idea I could lightly speak of getting my days and nights mixed up but I forgot this body is not mine. When I do not get the sleep I need, I am desecrating the Temple of God, and that is serious sin. 

So He saw what I was doing; patted me on the head; let me go for a little ride through the air before making a crash landing (ouch!); and tucked me in bed to get the rest I so need. I know I "so need" it because I have absolutely no problem falling asleep at night or to stay asleep in the morning.

Rev. 8:5 SAFE THUNDER (Come into Kitchen post)

"and there were voices, and thunderclaps, and lightnings, and an earthquake." 

 

What could those voices be saying before all those scary things mentioned in Rev.8:5?

Well, I imagined angels couldn't refrain--rather like me, at the beginning of this post--from slipping in the words: "Children of God, LOOK! Your Loving Heavenly FATHER has been watching all the evil you have had to endure! He saw what was being done to His truth, to His world, and He is putting an end to it!"

I can imagine one angel's voice assuring His own; another voice declaring an Omnipotent Sovereign's Perfect Justice; still another commanding all nature to yield to its Creator; finally, a joyful voice ringing out a call to see what God does...

Actually all that is extra, I realized. JUST ONE WHISPER from GOD of: "HOW DARE YOU!" would be enough to make anything get out of the way.

When I was a little girl, I remember learning the lyrics to the hymn: "How Great Thou Art". The teacher reminded us, whenever we're in a thunderstorm and "hear the rolling thunder", to think of our powerful Heavenly Father.

Some people don't want to see God's all-powerful side; they prefer a God Who is soft, always accepting, forgiving. Maybe it's been songleaders like this, but I've always felt safe with a FATHER-GOD whose voice is like thunder (but makes Himself slave to lambs like me), Who one day no one will dare stop when He make all things right.

Rev. 7:11 FALL, WORSHIP (Come into Kitchen post)

I looked at past posts and realized it's taking me a while to get through memory work. Will you put up with another entry about "fell" again? I think I'm sensitive to that word now, whenever I see it. Falls may seem to be interruptions, irritations. But some irritations can be coated over to form priceless treasures, can they not? Anyway...

"...and fell before the throne on their faces to worship God" (Rev. 7:11) 

Do I listen to God like that, or is it more like taking a stroll through nature and "feeling at one with all things;" lifting up my face to the sky and letting out a slow breath of utter contentment? We need to take care that we do not give obeisance to the Prince of the Power of the Air. He did promise to give "ALL THESE THINGS; just fall down and worship him". Jesus' response was: "Get thee hence, Satan. for it is written, Thou shalt worship the Lord thy God, and him only shalt thou serve."

Some angels fell worshiping before the throne of God; some refused, chose to follow the Prince of the Power of the Air so were cast out of Heaven and it sounds like they fell from the sky.

Hm; I said to myself; the first "fall" expressed worship; whereas the second "fall" was part of punishment.

. . . (I skipped over some of the journal entry. This one was rather long.)

So we lift our hands; we go down on our knees; we open up our hearts; we fall on our faces; and we realize we have been invited to approach the throne of God. Yes, we are on earth, but those of us in the Beloved are also in the heavenlies. Take off our shoes; this is holy ground. This is worship.

HE'S STILL SPEAKING TO ME!

 "And they heard a great voice from heaven saying unto them, Come up here."

(Rev. 11:12)

Today's portion speaks of how God's voice sounds, but it is only after the prophet had been willing to be killed--shamed and overcome by evil for God--and there's a period of silence. Am I ready to pass through a time of temporary not knowing why, even experiencing a season of darkness and obscurity, of fruitlessness--that's what death feels like--or will I too "kick at the goads" and say "No! I won't serve God then!" It may be only after that I would hear God's still, small voice saying, "Come close by my side, and let me whisper to You the way I see things."

I look at I Kings 8:58 and Psalm 51:17. King David did not parade his uprightness before God and offer himself to serve Him--no; by Ps. 51, he knew he had committed atrocious, unforgivable sin before God and was fully broken. But that broken spirit was the heart the Eternal Spirit would not despise--in fact, had inclined the variables of life to turn to Him, and it was Him alone Who would keep that heart fixed there, in God's forgiveness and acceptance and choosing to accept us, in spite of how so very unworthy we were!

There is a big difference in Peter's first declaration, "I will DIE before I deny you," and his latter: "You know I love You." 

The child of God can only say, brokenhearted, "You know what is in my heart; but You can have all of it anyway."

 And, I think, God responds, "That's what I needed to hear."

(Photos taken above in 1970,  right in 1986)

Rev. 11:13 SOBERING THOUGHTS (Come into Kitchen excerpt)

"The same hour...the tenth of the city fell...in the earthquake...seven thousand" (Rev. 11:13)

The same hour - sometimes, the very same time God seems to be doing something, He may be doing something else too; and he can operate on multiple levels at one time in ways that man's mind cannot fathom. We can never assume on the mind of God.

the tenth of the city - isn't this a minority? but it's of no consequence to God. Just a corner of a handkerchief or the center of it too, and to a great God, it's still a handkerchief. Perhaps it's called representation. Even the fallen minority can tell God about the heart of the standing majority.  The way God announces His woes or executes His mercies may be according to responses of this minority. Do Christians, the minority, call down God's mercies on fallen man, then turn and cry to the majority, "please, be reconciled to God"?

Fukushima Earthquake, 2011

in the earthquake - make no bones about it, this was an act of God. Recently, I was going back over 2011-3-11 earthquake we had in Fukushima, Japan, and how our family had to move out--all U.S. citizens within a certain radius of the damaged nuclear reactors were encouraged to move then, I remember. And with only what we could carry in our backpacks, we got on a bus moving through a back way--resourceful minds had patched together an exit route for the bus--and left Koriyama City, barely getting out of the metropolis. The Sendai airport was destroyed, train rails were uprooted but the bus--and few of us even managed to get gasoline then, so I don't know how they did it--somehow bounced over those split but manageable roads. Much could be said of that time.

were slain of men - not troubled, lost, or hurt, but killed; pretty final. And God Himself had punctuated the "period" there. And was not man the crowning act of creation, made in the image of the One...Who had killed him? Why?

seven thousand - wait...this was the number, the Holy Spirit seemed to bring to my memory, of faithful prophets who would not bow the knee to worship Baal, wasn't it?

This is just me. I couldn't help but see Moses' and Elijah's corpses from previous verses being infused with life and ascending to Heaven; believers praising God for His undeniable power; the unsaved deciding to shut these faithful Christians up but before they get around to it, a great earthquake comes from Heaven as if to say, "Oh, no you don't; I can get them Home Myself, thank you."

Hospital Window, Okinawa

Perhaps it's the YouTube movie I just viewed. The main character wanted to free her child from an institution and bring her home. Wouldn't that be a Heavenly Father's desire, not to leave His faithful loving children in the dark and broken walls of a cruel earth where they are mistreated, mocked, tortured, not given what they need, labeled hatemongers-criminals of society-minority outcasts?

The institution seemed to want to keep its patients medicated and unable to even recognize-respond to the rightful custodian who could grant her actual freedom. Is this "catatonic" inducement not brought about by the world's allure of social status, material security, and offers of satisfying vindication? Most human beings seem to lose sight of, desire for, Creator God Who can truly liberate and bring beauty out of ashes.

Back to "my vision". I saw a merciful Heavenly God taking His children Home in death, very aware, at the same time, those human creatures who remained and were not His would be terrified and then be given opportunity to give glory to the God of heaven.

We do not know this is what happens in Revelation, of course. But if God were to so choose, to use our deaths to lead unsaved to repentance, how many of us would willingly die for Him?

Garden, Missionary Acres

"And Jesus answered them saying, The hour is come, that the Son of man should be glorified. Verily, verily, I say unto you, Except a grain of wheat fall into the ground and die, it abideth alone; but if it die, it bringeth forth much fruit." (John 12:24)

Rev. 9:1, 12:6, 13:5 and 7 THOUGHTS

9:1 "to him was given the key of the bottomless pit" - Who forged the Padlock?

God. We can know too no matter how negative the situation we face today, God is Master Creator behind it all. Our God is in Control, and we need Never Fear.

12:6 "And the woman fled"

I  used to berate myself for being a big chicken and not standing up to adversity, for not being braver but running...then God showed me lots of Bible heroes who did so too:

• Jacob fled Esau's wrath
• Joseph fled potipher's wife
• Moses ran from "murderer!"
• David fled Saul's javelin
• Elijah ran from Jezebel
• Jeremiah fled from Jonathan's house
• Joseph and Mary escaped Herod
• Paul "basket-ed" the Jews
• and we see the woman of Rev.12:6 fleeing the Dragon

God doesn't point His finger at her and say, "You big chicken You!" No; it says there was a place prepared for her by God--He knew she'd come running and felt she was worth preparing a shelter for! All sorts of thoughts flew through my mind: "Come unto Me;" "There is a place of Quiet Rest;" "The righteous runneth into it, and are safe." How can you not love such a God?

13:5, 7 "and there was given unto him...it was given unto him...and power was given him"

God can Afford to give     -    Keeps Making Anew While Giving Away; Never Lessens

    "      has the Right to give     -    Actually Owns it; Unlike Dragon (2,15)  or Humans (4)  

    "      is Unselfish in giving    -    God's Conditions Can't Improve; Seeks Others' Benefit  

    "      has the Wisdom in giving    -    Man's Noblest Intents End in Pride and Abuse

    "      Loves to give    -    God Cannot Not have Mercy; It's His Nature! (Jer.31:20)

Rev. 12:6 WOMAN FLEEING INTO WILDERNESS (Come Into Kitchen post)

 "The woman FLED into the wilderness," it says in Rev. 12:6. I shared with some friends today about this passage. I hadn't realized how many characters in the Bible actually fled. Because I've berated myself in being such a big chicken, a coward, running away. I hear about people facing dangers so bravely...I know I probably wouldn't do that. I'd be looking for EXITS out of the room and using any energy to figure out the most efficient way to use them.

Sometimes I feel as Brave as a Worm...

But wait. Bible characters? Jacob fled from Esau's wrath. Joseph fled from Potipher's wife. Moses fled from "murderer!" David fled from Saul's men. Elijah fled from Jezebel. Jeremiah fled from Jonathan the scribe. Joseph and Mary fled from Herod. Paul fled from the Pharisees. And yes, the Woman in Revelation 12 fled from the Dragon.

And what I saw, in the phrase right after the comma after the information that she ran was what blew me away: "where she had a place PREPARED BY GOD"! I still remember the time Jesus defended a woman, "Leave her alone; she's MINE." (When she was criticized for extravagant use of oil.) I thought then, I'd love someone to think of me like that. A heartbeat later, I realized SOMEONE does! 

And then this verse affected me in the same way: GOD HAD TAKEN SPECIAL PAINS to prepare a special place out in the wilderness for a loved one HE KNEW would come running out there and would need a shelter! The God of the Universe gave the woman V.I.P. treatment!

Readied Room

He didn't call her a coward. He caught up the infant she'd given birth to (v.5); made sure His bride would be nourished 'til fully recuperated (v.6); and told Michael the archangel to get the servants under him to confront and expel any threatening renegades unhappy with God or heaven (vs.7-9).

Some people would say the woman of Revelation 12 is Israel, and the prophecy there is not for all. This is true. We cannot "claim" these promises to be ours accurately. But...

There was a Gentile mother who, when Jesus looked at her and told her He'd come to give bread to the Jews, and it would be wrong to take bread away from the children to which they were intended and give it to the puppies, she responded by saying even they'd be happy with the crumbs under the table. I am thinking the God who'd receive a mother in the wilderness--who'd run away from a dragon--and not call her a coward would be large-hearted enough to allow her to have a puppy, and whisper to those feeding the woman to make sure her bread is the extra crumbly type. Even Boaz told his reapers to allow handfuls of barley to fall for Ruth to glean, didn't he? Can we not hope for our Lord to be at least as gracious as a human lord?

Again, after reading these few verse and thinking these thoughts, I found myself saying, "Hey--I'm not supposed to be feeling this way. I'm reading in Revelation, not Psalms."

MCC - where Ron Sisco taught Revelation

One of the friends I was talking with was the person I had to thank most for giving me real desire to look at the book again. Ron Sisco, a retired missionary and interim leader-pastor of the English department of a church up in mainland Japan I fellowshipped at 10 years ago, preached through studies in Revelation, and his messages then got me interested. They were recorded then posted on the church website several years later. I've listened to them repeatedly since. He'd emphasized then the blessing that comes along with its reading. A lot of people avoid it, he said, because Revelation looks scary-difficult.

Maybe I'm a bit strange, but if it's not being studied, I think it feels kinda good.

Rev 22:2 HEAVENLY FRUIT (Come into Kitchen post)

 Daddy saw I'd left my slice of golden peach untouched and asked me, "Junie, you don't want your peach?" At that time, my parents were speaking to us in only Japanese, so this was in Japanese.  I'd answered the Japanese way, which is responding to the QUESTION. "No." (In my mind, that meant, No; I DO want my peach!)

Daddy heard, "No; I don't want the peach." Well, you can imagine when, to my horror, he said, "Oh! Well, I'll just" and scooped the slice into his mouth!" I screamed and cried I was saving it and Mommy came running into the room. It took a while before everything got all cleared up, and we figured out what had happened.

Revelation 22:2 speaks of the tree in heaven that bears fruit every month of the year, whose leaves were for the healing of the nations. I am a fruit person. I have always loved fruit more than cake, chocolates, or ice cream. But I wonder what heavenly fruit will taste like.

And...I wonder what language we'll be speaking up there. I am sure, when we get to Heaven, there won't be any misunderstandings or communication tangles, like Daddy and I had! I am so looking forward to that. Aren't we all?

Rev. 11:4 CANDLESTICK VS. LAMPSTAND (Come Into Kitchen post)

 I'm back in Revelation again. I was in the Gospel of John for a little bit. (I plan on doing Romans, Acts, and John in the future so am biting off portions of some of the longer, interesting chapters now so I won't have to do all of it then! I mean, have you seen how long some of those chapters are?! Hebrews and Revelations are long BOOKS, but most of their CHAPTERS are much shorter so easier to do.)

Right now, I'm staring at the words "two candlesticks" in Rev.11:4, reworded "lampstands". Something in me wants to stick to the original expression. NOT because I insist it's more accurate; it probably is closer to "lampstand" today, if expert linguists say that's the better word to use. But there are different reasons I want to learn "candlestick" instead. Can I share them here, in my personal blog?

Candles feel smaller, weaker, kinda like they might give off light more feebly than lamps, right? Well, I don't think there's a Christian around who hasn't felt too little to make a difference in this big, cruel world. What's one little candle? But God says let it shine. And the mental image that gets me all woozy is of the Loving Owner of the flame holding up a candlestick with his left hand, cupping it with His right as if to shelter it against any draft.

I don't get the same feeling with the word "lampstand". It's personal, not doctrinal; I won't disassociate with any Christian on the basis of this.

Seriously tho'. The other personal reason I prefer "candlestick" is because that word is used in verses elsewhere all over the Bible too, and I hear echoes in my mind when that verse is sounded, using "candlesticks", reminding me of the golden candlesticks of the tabernacle, how we aren't to hide candlesticks under a bushel but set it on a hill for all to see its light, how Ephesus was to be God's candlestick of truth, etc.... Can't "hear" those verses if the modern word "lampstand", altho' more accurate, is used. Like I said, it's just personal preference.

Candlestick or lampstand--whichever one will best help in our walk Home--just learn it! Either way, I've heard your grades at school improve when you do Bible memory. Don't ask me how it works, but altho' rote memory and creative powers seem to work diametrically opposed to each other, my times of greatest unfettered imagination in writing and drawing have been parallel to adherence with scripture memorization! And those who fear loss of mental clarity in senior years--hiding God's Word in the heart proves to be a treasure and a safeguard--CANDLESTICK OR LAMPSTAND!

RAINBOW

 A young boy had his heart broken constantly by a rich CEO father who regularly broke his promises to him.

One day, the son went to Sunday School and heard the story of Noah and the flood. At the end of the story, he heard God made a promise never to send another flood to destroy the earth, and as a sign He would keep His promise, He set a rainbow in the sky.

Nice story, the little boy thought. But as soon as the world got real bad, and it got inconvenient, God would quickly wash away that promise with a downpour. The boy had almost expected the flood at the beginning of the story of Noah and the wickedness of man on the earth being great, but then there was a rainbow.

It made the little boy think, maybe God wasn't like his dad.

"Blessed be God, even the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ"

(2 Corinthians 1:3) 

Thoughts from Xmas 2001: Xmas 2001 Parallels

1.     Mary's "How Can It Be?"

the Christian's doubting HIMSELF when God says He wants to do something

2.     Joseph's Mental Turmoil

Confusion with how to interact with OTHERS God may place around us

3.    Full Term Pregnancy Travel

Some of God's Designs seem Inconvenient, even Detrimental! We simply Trust.

4.    No Vacancy

Too busy accommodating man to give Christ priority and "gushing love" space in our hearts?

5.    Mary and Joseph's TAKING of the stable--birth of the baby

God's entering of what little room we DO give Him--then filling it up with JOY

6.    Research of Wise Men

Conclusive Result of True Science and Honest Seeking: GOD.

7.    Gifts were given for birth of Earthly King

What Gift is Fit to present to the King of the Universe?

いつまでも

 （この記事は英語で書いたものを通訳アプリで一度訳して、それをチェックしただけ。）

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私は来世にいる夢を見た。交通事故で死んだのだろうか？それとも突然の心臓発作？あるいはテロリストの銃弾？いずれにせよ、私は宇宙の絶対的に正義の神と対面し、自分の生き方を正当化するよう求められていた。その神は、私が想像していたどんなものよりも、はるかに偉大で畏敬の念を抱かせる存在だった。

偉大なる全能の神が罪びとである私に怒りの目を下すのが見えた。神は私を持ち上げ、火の池に投げ込もうとした。

 

「イエスさま！」と心の中から声が漏れた。あまりの恐怖に、叫ぶことさえできなかった。そこに投げ込まれるのは当然だと分かっていたが、いつまでも、いつまでも、そこから出られなくなるという恐ろしい考えが私を麻痺させた。「イエスさま！」

私を永遠の絶望の淵に突き落とすはずだった動きが、私をさらに高く持ち上げ続け、周囲は明るくなり、私はどこかに着地した。

 人々が駆け寄ってきた。「巡礼者よ！兄弟よ！もう永遠に安全なのだ！」彼らは人間だったと思う。この者たちは皆輝くような笑顔を浮かべ、隠し事も脅しも冷酷さも感じさせず、まるで子供のようだった。

 私は息を呑んだ――下で何が起こったのだ？私は振り返り、下を見た。

 まさか？罪に対する怒りで暗く染まった神の顔が、地面から持ち上げた人物を見つめていた…待てよ…ほんの数秒前まで私だった…ならば、それは私ではなく、イエスさまだ！そして神は彼を暗い穴の底に投げ込んだ。

 私は立っていた場所の端まで走り、ヒステリックになった。「なんてこと！だめだめだめ！」しかし、私の後ろから他の人たちの足音、そして「心配する必要はありませんよ。それが、イエス様が十字架でなさったことなのです」という声が聞こえた。

「昨日も今日も、そしてこれからも、いつまでも私は変わらない」と、また別の声がした。「私が何をしたのかを見てもらいたかっただけです。」

「イエス様！」私は慌てて振り返ると、イエス様が両腕を広げてこちらに向かって歩いてくるのが見えた。

「でも、あなたは…私の代わりに…いたと思ったのに。」私は言葉が出ず、イエス様の腕の中に倒れ込んだ。

「十字架の上でわたしが何をしたのか、君に見てほしかったのでね。必要なら何度でもやるよ。でも、もうその必要はないんだ」と彼は静かに言い、私の頭を撫でた。

「ああ、イエス様、ありがとうございます」と言おうとしたその時、悲鳴が聞こえた。

誰かが激しく身振り手振りをしながらどもりながら、「で、でも、あれはイエス様ですよ！」と言っていた。

自分の涙はまだ乾いていないのに、あの人に言った：「大丈夫。イエス様は十字架の上であなたたのために何をしてくださったのか、知ってほしかっただけ。ホラ、見て。」私の後ろに、両手を広げ、昨日も今日も、そしていつまでも、ご自身の民のために微笑んでくださる方がいました。

Cat and Mouse...I mean, Birds...Ducks? (8-5-2011)

My daughter and I were baking cookies once for a youth group activity. We were actually trying to make them into the shape of birds because the theme was peace and the cookies were supposed to be doves...but the only bird-shaped cookie cutter we could find looked more like a flattened, upside-down triangle with a beak on one end. So Emily came up with the idea of using duck-shaped cookie cutters instead.

I think they looked like DUCKS, just plain ducks. Emily, in a playful mood, made one triangle bird cookie, "mama bird", then lined up other ducklings in a row after it. She went back to the bed, came back with the stuffed cat, propped her up at the end of the table, and said, "Look! The cat is after the unsuspecting birds! It's a nice, sunny day, and the little chickies are just following mommy...won't they be surprised when terror pounces all over them!"

Sometimes my daughter and I have really deep, meaningful talks.

TRUST ME; I'M YOUR FATHER

There was one program about an orphan who'd grown up thinking her parents had been killed in a fire. A wealthy butler-type man finds her, seems to fool her into thinking he may be her father who actually escaped the fire, seems to frame her for his master's murder after which he becomes filthy rich, and she is thrown into jail. The police smell something funny and discover the murder was committed by the man posing to be her father after all, and he is executed, she is given rightful claim to fortune.

The VERY END of the program has a surprise. THAT BUTLER WAS ACTUALLY HER REAL FATHER, WANTING HER BEST, AND HE HAD POSED TO FRAME HER AND BE EXECUTED FOR A CRIME, KNOWING SHE WOULD END UP WITH FORTUNE BECAUSE OF IT! Long story simplified.

Murder and framing are by no means right and noble, and this is not an attempt to justify either. But it got me thinking. Sometimes God may ACT like He's "framing us" because He loves us so much He is willing to be HATED for what He does for us! At the end of the story, the main character recalls the butler's words to her: "Trust me; I'm your father." He hadn't been saying that just to fool her; he really meant it. We need to remember always too to trust God; He's our Father!

"Though he slay me, yet will I trust him" (Job 13:15a)

"Like as a father pitieth his children, so the Lord pitieth them that fear him. (Ps. 103:13)

MY FAVORITE JERK

The disciple Peter was one character in the Bible we could really love and thank God for his example, BECAUSE HE REALLY ACTED LIKE A JERK sometimes but LOVED THE LORD WITH ALL HIS HEART, and GOD LOVED HIM BACK IN A SPECIAL WAY AND USED HIM MIGHTILY! Encouragement for all of us who are regular jerks but oh do love God too and really do want Him to use us!

ALARMING DISCOVERY

The night before, I'd crawled under the covers with the alarming thought I'd forgotten to set the alarm clock "so God, please wake me up in the morning!" VERY early Sunday morning, I was startled awake with the sound of the alarm clock! It turns out when my children had toyed with it, and I put it back where it belonged, I must've pressed the button setting it to go off. So I think God must've chuckled when He heard my prayer the night before. "You just THINK you didn't set the alarm! You don't know you did!"

This was part of the testimony I shared with the church folk at worship service.

GOD KNEW BETTER

Sunday morning, I woke up with my back hurting something bad--long, cold nights do that to me sometimes, especially since last year. I keep a heating pad on my mattress, and I turned it on, lay there for a few minutes pondering staying home from church for the day. I'd taken a peek at the weather forecast, showing it would be warm; so I said to myself that God had warm weather waiting "just for me"; I COULDN'T possibly stay home and "let it go to waste"! I didn't know what God had for me but thought it had to be special for all the opposition I was feeling to keep me from going. Walking into the church building, I said, "Okay God; give it to me!"

A few hours later, when I saw Russel Waala come through those church doors--and God had arranged it so I would be the one standing nearest to the door then--I could almost see God smiling! "See June; you THOUGHT you wanted to stay home; I KNEW BETTER! You would've been real sorry if you had!"

* This post is NOT saying people should always fight against physical discomfort and attend church meetings no matter what; I am just relating one experience the Holy Spirit happened to give me that time; I realize there are exceptions!

ACT LIKE IT!

One of Piper's mentions of John 14:15, "If ye love me, keep my commandments" was about the completely wrong interpretation it is often given: Keep doing right if you want to prove you really love me. What it really says, he asserted, was: If you really love me, ACT LIKE IT!

SHOCKING TRUTH

Something else happened a few days ago. I was walking along this pretty new path near our home and saw doggie droppings. Should I try to move them?--but I didn't have anything with me and couldn't see anything around that would help, so I didn't. (I did so last week when I saw a worm had come out onto the path, and deposited it onto the dirt nearby so others taking a walk wouldn't have to see the yucky creature.)

And a funny scene came into my head: what if somebody saw me and asked, "What are you doing that for?" I COULD reply--with a halo above my head, of course--"because I don't want peoples' walks being ruined with unpleasant stuff like this"...or give an HONEST reply--I wonder what their reaction would be if I said--"because I want people to think I'm a good person"!

The heart of man, the heart of man. Jeremiah says the heart of man is DECEITFUL above all things, and desperately wicked. Even when we think we're doing good things with good motives, the real reason is we want to feel good about ourselves, and if someone else would think so too, all the better!

FOLLOW

This is the day children of God commemorate the way God made Reconciliation possible for us by sending us His Son Jesus to die on the Cross--HALLELUJAH!  May the day be soaked through with awareness of His special love rebounding in irrepressible praise.

---------------------------

A short thot for today:

"Surely GOODNESS and MERCY shall FOLLOW me all the days of my life, and I will dwell in the house of the LORD forever." (Ps.23:6)

O Lord, FOLLOW me!

When my back is turned to Thee, follow me!

Sinful, wretched soul I am, yet follow me!

Then Lord, may I turn around and

be able to do none else than

with all my being

follow hard after Thee.

HELPLESS FOOLS

You know that poem Piper wrote about getting roses for his wife for their 30th anniversary? This morning, when having my Garden Time and thinking about how I really wanted to clean house today, I found myself praying, "Lord, enable me--fill my life with overspill of joy power--to do right, not just because it's right and what I'm supposed to do, but because it's something I absolutely WANT to do. Lord, help me not be able to help it but do right!"

"Oh Johnny, these are BEAUTIFUL! Why did you?"

"I...(chuckle)...I couldn't HELP myself!"

May we be "helpless", happy fools for Thee!

HEDONISTIC MOTIVES

 - I go to the beach

Not just because I have to measure the tide

    or take samples of the sand back to the laboratory

        or study the sea life

But I go there to swim with long strokes, circling freely with my arms

    to feel the ocean breeze and cool splash of water

        to listen to laughing seagulls and children.

- I eat this meal

Not just because I have to ingest proteins, vitamins, water, calories

necessary to sustain life

    or participate in customary activity to be courteous

        or even to maintain self-discipline in daily routine

But my mouth waters - happily, effortlessly

    when I chomp into the juicy steak and buttery potatoes

        when I become momentarily oblivious to all other senses.

Altho' of a different category,

- I am a Christian

Not just because I have to uphold exemplary standards of moral living

    or think of it as defining my religious persuasion

        or even to please God

But because He is MY TREASURE and I get to revel in

the power, joy, freedom He affords my day

    because He works to please ME

        because then I can live life to the -nth degree

...to ENJOY!

BENDS DOWN A WHOLE LOT (Osaka Trip Series)

I thought about meeting Brian at the Eki when I got to Osaka, surprised at how much I had to stre-t-t-t-t-ch up just to give him a hug (we Orientals don't get that close to heaven!). I said to myself, "How in the world does someone as small as 5-year-old Amy get her arms around her daddy's neck?" And I could picture Brian saying, with a twinkle in his eye, "Well, I have to bend down a little."

And it hit me. God "BENDS DOWN A WHOLE LOT" to see we get embraces of Love from Him!

A slight change to a familiar hymn:

"Into my bondage, sorrow and night,

Jesus has come, Jesus has come;

Bringing His freedom, gladness and light,

Jesus has come to me.

Into my sickness, bringing His health,

Into my want and bringing His wealth,

Into my sin and bringing Himself,

Jesus has come to me."

PREARRANGED MEETING (Osaka Trip Series)

When I got off at the Osaka train terminal, I realized the place was much bigger than I'd thought; the words I'd given Brian, "I'll see you at the Osaka train station" was nowhere near sufficient! Then the thought crossed my mind about Mommy and Daddy meeting for the first time in front of the Forbidden City Restaurant in Tokyo when they hadn't even seen each other, and I knew God could get me and Brian together.

"Okay, God, You'll have to get us together, 'cuz we absolutely have no idea where to go or how to meet!" I got off the train at the central exit and began walking towards the west exit. I didn't know it, but Brian had gotten to the train station and prayed the same thing as he began walking from the west exit to the central one. We met in 5 mins., as if the meeting had been prearranged.

Well, I guess it had been. God had arranged it, just not let us humans know!

EPILEPSY EXTRAS (Epilepsy Series)

 * The time Kinya jerked open the shower door when I was still inside. He must've been wondering if I was lying there unconscious after a seizure 'cuz it was taking so long for me to get out. Actually, I was done with bathing but was cleaning tho' still in my birthday suit. Things like this are EVIDENCES of Kinya's caring about--worrying about, anyway--me, since only something like that would make him take such an impulsive action. And the thought that normally follows: GOD PUT KINYA THERE TO WATCH OVER ME!

* I could go on and on about the "extras" I've gleaned as a result of my epilepsy...oh, just one more! I did tell you, didn't I, about Kinya's "cyberspace knight" incident in which he protected a person being bullied on the Internet? It's a LONG story. But the reason her website caught his eye was because she was engaged to a person who had epilepsy, and Kinya's self-introduction to her was something like, "I think we have something very much in common." And they'd become special acquaintances that way. It was my having epilepsy that gave him this outreach; that resulted in his being instrumental in protecting her; that, as a result of this incident, ,y first poem to Kinya was composed; that, as a result of that, led to a second poem which ended up in commencement of letter-writing to Kinya.

Back in the 9th grade, I did as Paul did in the New Testament. I asked God to take away the "thorn in the flesh". If only we'd be able to recognize His "My grace is sufficient for thee" actually ends up being " My blessings will be too much, burst and overflow, for thee". What we often see as holes, flaws, are just APERTURES FOR HIS BLESSINGS without which we would miss out on so much!

FORESEEN RESCHEDULING (Epilepsy Series)

Tuesday's Martha and Mary Kai activity, I'd been pretty sure I wouldn't be able to attend because I needed to be at school, so I'd told the pastor's wife and the woman's group president. It turns out the place we'd planned on going to was closed Tuesday due to a national holiday Monday (I guess because it's a tourist place, a place lots of people go to for holidays CAN'T close then so have their days off the following days!) So our M and & Kai was rescheduled to next month, and I can go then Besides, God knew that even if my school activity ended in time for me to hurry to church for M and M Kai, I wouldn't be in physical condition to do so! (I told you about the seizures that afternoon!) Would a human physician have been able to foresee my physical condition ahead of time...or even if he could, would he have been able to tell establishments to close on certain days because events needed to be rescheduled? Praise God the Orchestrator of the Universe Whose we are!

RED SEA CROSSING (Epilepsy Series)

That time of the month is never a really good time for me, sometimes the epilepsy medicine being lost in the blood and resulting in petit mal seizures.... Petit mal seizures aren't bad at all, just can be embarrassing if they happen at the wrong time (like when teaching children's church down at Tama). This time tho', it's been a little more than usual--had three this morning while having devotions--and worried that they might act up again when I went to school for yakuin stuff (collecting and counting money for bazaar food). Over two hours, nothing happened. I came home and was on this computer, making the announcement for next month's children's meeting, and I had several seizures. It's like God held back the water for the Israelites to cross, then let it go when the restraint was no longer necessary. I's gonna go upstairs and nap; I've had several more while writing these two paragraphs. Mebbe I'll let Hubby either make supper or take the kiddos out tonight. He's good about that. (Hubby DID take the kids out. And God gave me time for writing him a letter, listening to Piper tapes, doing a little emailing!)

WEIGHTY BENEFIT (Housecleaning, Mundane Series)

Emily's been gone since Wed on her "shukuhaku gakushuu" (overnight excursion) and will get back tomorrow evening. Kinya took her to the store several times to get her all the things she needed. And I packed her backpack--so much! But if, in an effort to make her backpack lighter, she REMOVED some of the items, she would've definitely been unhappy when she NEEDED the things she removed. Sometimes God gives us heavy burdens. If we bristle, cringe, REFUSE to carry the burdens He presents us with, later on we'll be VERY SORRY. God gives us only those things we NEED, things that will BENEFIT us, not just burdens to make us suffer I wrote about the above in Japanese, along with Matt. 7:11 and Lam. 3:32-33 (not to be confused with the oft-quoted 22-23), in a letter to Kinya.

WEEDING AND LEADING (Housecleaning and Mundane Series)

Sunday is the neighborhood clean-up day, when "everyone" will be going to the nearby Temple to weed the yard - mostly to get it ready for the fall festival. I feel funny about doing weeding work at the Temple 7-8 AM then leaving for church to sit at the feet of a God Who HATES idolatry. I don't want to look self-righteous and judgmental but don't want to convey a pragmatic hypocrisy either in my disloyalty to Love - I think it's called "uwaki" (an affair) so was wondering about what to do when...

I burned myself. It was with a lid of a pot. Almost seemed to be God's loud-and-clear "I really don't want you to go." But methinks the burn was light enough to be able to go anyway (er, that is, God seemed to give me the idea to keep it under running water for long periods of time) but enunciate I WILL not go--not CANNOT go--tho' am willing to help w/whatever else is necessary. Lord, give wisdom and a non-obnoxious spirit, but guard me from desire for man's approval and understanding. Oh to be "helpless" in love to be able to think of nothing else than to please thee!

About Sunday's weeding. It turns out I'd misunderstood, again. Altho' the fall festival mentioned in the announcement bears the temple's name, the actual weeding Sunday will be done, not at the Temple, but on the usual open lot! Yes! He'd let me burn myself to let me know how He felt then let it keep from getting bad because He knew it wouldn't be necessary! Thank You, Lord!

I think I want to laugh. The above weeding activity was 9/22. The morning of 9/25, God led me to read Song 8:7, including the words "many waters cannot quench love", mentally tying together BURNING with GOD'S JEALOUS LOVE! Perhaps that wasn't the intent of the passage, but He seemed to whisper it to me with a smile and a wink, and then He seemed to let me hear the echo in my own heart for 8:13, CAUSE ME TO HEAR your voice all the time, dear Jesus!

LEGALISTIC WINDOW CLEANING (Housecleaning, Mundane Series)

Our apartment windows need to be cleaned badly. But it's one thing to see the negative--grime needing to be removed--thus clean them, and another thing to anticipate positives--how clear they will be and readily admit light as well as how fresh I will feel--thus clean them.

If you want another parallel here, it would be motivations of Legalistic Christianity--removing offensive behavior and habits, even standards--as opposed to motivations of Grace--desiring an unimpeded, intimate love-relationship with God, when resolving sin. They're both seemingly doing the same thing.

UELGH! (Housecleaning, Mundane Series)

Part of my letter to Kinya today was about the cleaning. There are some things that needed to be cleaned again and again because they keep getting dirty...and there are other areas that altho' have been thoroughly cleaned don't even look like have been touched because are just plain disorderly. And then, like in the former post, there are efforts that actually backfire. LOTS of cleaning has been done, but you can't tell because of having to work through layers of filth to get to dirt! As I told Joyce, when she comes next week, I won't guarantee a spic-and-span home, but at least I'll be able to show her the kitchen exhaust fan without feeling ashamed (the grime there was...UELGH! I'm glad I didn't have to stand outside next to that fan!) There's a children's TV Program on now about a little girl who fell into a drum can and found herself sucked into a world of trash--when she realizes where she is, she "UCK!"s with the dirt surrounding her. Can you imagine what the Lord Jesus must've felt to come into the stench of man? to LIVE here for over 30 years?!?

NOT KNOTHOLES (Housecleaning, Mundane Series)

I'm going to skip a lot of stuff and zero in on something that happened this morning when looking at the wooden wall near the ceiling. I thought I was staring at knotholes, then I realized they were old cobwebs that had snapped, curled into balls, dried up against the wall! I mean, "knotholes" " came off" when wiped! (Some of those "knotholes" MOVED! I realized then they were teeny tiny spiders!) The house was even dirtier than I had thought, and I'd thought it was filthy! I said to myself, isn't that so much like the way I look at my heart? I figure some of the unpleasant things I see are natural results of aging, experiences, temperament...and I realize later they are plain SIN that need to be confessed as much! The heart is dirtier than imagined. Jer. 17:9.

I mentioned they came off when wiped. After I realized what they really were, I started going around the rooms again to take down the "knothole" cobwebs I now knew they were. Ha, ha; can't fool me now! Here comes June, the "Clean Crusader". But one room took me by surprise. The wall was of a rough sandpaper-like texture, so when I "wiped" it, the tangled threads taken off other walls were actually pulled off the mop and lodged on the wall I'd tried to clean! I heard an echo: "YOU CANNOT MANAGE SIN. God knows how to best deal with them. Our part is to admit, confess, forsake. Trying to repress, cover up, belittle, make better, etc..., only makes matters worse. (Later, a vacuum cleaner applied to that wall took care of the problem. It's clean now.) (^_^)

MONSTER SPIDER (Housecleaning, Mundane Series)

I don't know what happened to the record of this incident; it happened a few weeks ago, but I don't have it on file anywhere! Here 'tis in a nutshell:

I'd sent the kids upstairs to bed, and a few moments later, they came charging back downstairs with, "There's a huge spider in the room, and we can't go to sleep with it there!" I grabbed some tissue, a flyswatter, and headed up the stairs, thinking I'd take care of the bothersome bug, tell the children to go to bed for goodness' sake. But when I entered the room and took a look at the ceiling, my face contorted into this eerie smile. I'm used to the long-legged type, but this spider was the fat-bodied, tarantula type, bigger than any I've seen live before.

It seemed to be taking this threatening pose, as if he would touch me if I got any closer. I sez, if I swing and miss, it would no doubt scurry off to its hiding place, and then nobody would ever get to sleep knowing it could come out of hiding in the middle of the night...but worse, if I hit it-- it was a little lower than the ceiling, so I'd have to get up on a stool and swing up at it--its carcase might come land on my head or face--ooh! uck! Shivers!...and the thought made me unable to move. So I told the kids they could sleep on the futons in the room nextdoor, and I camped out on the beds with a good book to read the hour and a half before Hubby came home; I planned on having him take care of the creepy crawler! I wanted to keep an eye on it tho', ' cuz I didn't want it scurrying out of sight or NO ONE--including me--would go to sleep in that room at night!

When Huggy came home, He breathed a "It's HUGE!" but took two swipes and took care of the creature on the wall. Relief...I think. Emily wondered how that spider got inside the house to begin with, and I was left wondering if there were spider eggs nesting somewhere. Know any good spider egg hunters?

Like sin, I sez. At first, we think, no big deal. I can take care of it. But before we realize it, it's become a fat, paralyzing problem against which we have no power or peace of mind. But we turn it over to God and He takes care of it with 2 strokes: confession--wham--and repentance--wham! (This came to mind just awhile ago: actually, the only real problem that remains is our keeping those spider eggs--harboring seeds of temptation and future sin--in our hearts somewhere!)

THAT KIND OF "HAPPY"

Lord, why is it that

    when one drinks fully, deeply of Thee

    other pleasures and thrills suddenly seem so weakly,

                                                                 so unappealing,

Might it not have been better                             so unsatisfying? 

    never to have taken a draught

    and go on being satisfied, even with a lower level of happiness,

    and not even know there could be anything better?

"Is it better never to have loved

    And not know the bittersweet pain of parting?

Don't even glance at the "lower levels".

    With your eye-heart plastered on ME,

    Won't your heart be bursting with so much "happy"

    That nothing else will really matter?

I CAN give that kind of 'happy', you know."

OPTIONS

 "Convictions" is ABSOLUTELY THE WRONG WORD. / Personal standards ought be called "Options", like air-conditioning or power locks in new-car-purchase catalogues. / They should be ways Christians find they GET TO "love God better" thus ENJOY LIFE MORE!

IF wearing skirts for women or having short hair for men ALLOWS the individual to proclaim, / "MY GOD IS WORTH MY TREATING HIM THIS SPECIAL-- / EVEN IF THE REST OF THE WORLD THINKS I'M DORKY FOR DOING IT! / THEY WILL JUST HAVE TO FORGIVE ME!" methinks that "option's" okay.

IF listening to non-beat music is motivated by the feeling: / "I WANT TO PRAISE GOD WITH ALL OF MY HEART- /-AND I WANT TO STAY FREE FROM EMOTIONS THAT WOULD WEAKEN IT / I WANT TO STAY AS FAR AWAY AS I CAN FROM WORLDLY EXPRESSIONS OF COUNTERFEIT PLEASURE THAT MIGHT CHEAPEN IT IN ANY WAY!" / then that "option's" okay too, methinks.

BUT when they become MEASURING LINES for / "right/wrong" living, "spirituality", or factions...uck!

JUNE 2002 THOUGHTS

Real Power in Leadership is

 to be able to stoop down to the weakest, feeblest, frailest, / and motivate them with words of conviction: If God could do it for a "hopeless loser" like me, / HE CAN DO IT FOR ANYBODY--YOU!

from John Piper's taped message, "Insufficiency of Hell":

And people's response should be remorse & regret that they've / MISSED SO MUCH! / Fall out of love with the world and fall in love with God" / By "world," 90% innocent things: / the main problem in the church isn't gross sin; it's loving innocent things! / "The pain of genuine repentance flows from the pleasure of seeing God."

GOD'S ADS

Can we truly be salt-of-the-earth to "seduce", allure, attract to God if

    those who see us see we have "sampled" Him and

    do not find Him satisfying?

If they see, however, that

    we find Him better than anything we ever expected,

    that He becomes all-consuming,

    that we become so intoxicated with/addicted to Him,

    that it results in our easily throwing away things--

    legitimate, desirable things--in order to "get God,"

    and the only reason we might hold onto other things is for

    their pawning value to gain more of Him...

    well, that's GOTTA create the response:

    What makes him so happy? I want some too!